“For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven… a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance…” Ecclesiastes 3:1,4
Emotions and the purpose of their presence is often misunderstood in today’s culture. For some people, emotions are used to make decisions on what is right or wrong, good or bad. If a situation elicits bad emotions, it is deemed harmful and something to be avoided. For them, happiness becomes the ultimate goal. Others view emotions as a weakness, something to be avoided. For them, emotions stand in the way of logic and reason so they attempt to operate as if they do not exist. The truth, however, lies somewhere in between these two extremes.
Whether you like them or not, emotions are part of the human experience. They allow us to connect and create. They help us to interact with others and to engage in a meaningful way with the world around us. Music, art, literature and nature impact us due to our emotional responses to the beauty of their creation. Emotions also allow us to react and respond to the fallen and broken aspects of our world. They are a crucial part of our internal warning system to notify us when something happens that misaligns with what we believe should happen. They help us to connect with our morals and beliefs.
Psychologically speaking, emotions are temporary mental states prompted by subjectively interpreted interactions with our environment that elicit automatic physiological responses that motivate responsive behavior. In short, our perceptions of a situation will inspire an emotional response that in turn brings about a behavioral response. For example, seeing Spring flowers makes me feel happy. When I see colorful blossoms (environment), my body responds with a warm and light feeling that starts in my chest and radiates out (automatic physiological response). I may respond with a smile or an expression of contentment or joy (responsive behavior). Someone who suffers from seasonal allergies could have a different emotional response to those same flowers. They could see the same blossoms, but due to their personal history, Spring flowers mean physical pain which will impact their emotional response. They may respond with frustration, annoyance or worry.
Each emotion was given to us by God for a reason. Positive emotions are easy to accept as they are enjoyable to experience. Negative emotions can be more difficult to accept but may be helpful in their own way. Anger arises when we feel threatened, hurt or witness injustice. The physiological response of anger gives us a burst of energy to take action. We feel sad when we experience loss, which slows us down and causes us to seek comfort from those around us. Fear emerges when danger is present. It activates the “fight or flight” response needed to get us to safety. We feel guilty when our actions do not align with our moral beliefs, motivating us to make amends for our actions and change our behavior. God uses negative emotions in our lives to help us to respond appropriately to our sinful, fallen world. Negative emotions can lead us to repentance and seek comfort from our Heavenly Father. Negative emotions drive us to cling to the hope that one day Jesus will “wipe away every tear from <our> eyes and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore” (Revelation 21:3a).
Emotions become problematic when we misunderstand or misinterpret the world around us. While emotions are real, they are not always truthful. Since they are subjective responses to our environment, they rely on our personal interpretation of our situation. Our interpretations are influenced by our expectations, our beliefs about ourselves, others and the world and our previous experiences. When our interpretations are misaligned from the truth of the situation, we can experience emotions that are disproportionate to the situation. Emotions can help inform our understanding of a situation, but they should not have the final say. We can acknowledge our emotional response while allowing our logical brains to align our thoughts and our behaviors with what we know to be right and true.
If you are struggling with your emotions, seek wise counsel to help you determine if your beliefs, expectations and views of the world around you are grounded in truth. Emotions are meant to be temporary but we can get stuck in emotion when we do not use healthy coping skills to move through the negative emotions we experience. If you are feeling stuck in negative emotion and not sure who to turn to, please reach out to our counseling center. We are here to support you.
